I canont argue with you here. I COMPLETELY agree with this post. In fact, this is one of the best posts I have read in a long long time. I thought i added you on myspace? Mine is www.myspace.com/amourpassion  put "Rose" or "Kwok" as the last name if it asks you for a last name.

Let me ask you this..lets say today..  you invite a girl to go out with you for dinner..   and you pay for dinner (expensive one)..  so are you being altruism or being selfish?? 

Well, mike... what is the reason for inviting a girl out for dinner? If it's a total stranger and you're not going to get anything out of it... Let's say you take a homeless lady out to an expensive dinner because she's hungry and you're not expecting anything in return... then yeah it would be altruistic. Otherwise, you're doing so for alterior motives and cannot be counted as altruism..

then take the expectation out of the equation..  then you will have a genuine altruistic lifestyle..   and girls will come to you because of your charisma..

dude.. I'm arguing that altruism should not exist... because if you're altruistic. Then you're weak and get used... Just sick of being nice... Plus you can't take expectation out of anything. Expectation is in everything. You expect to wake up to go to work and expect to get paid. You expect to go to dinner with a girl and expect conversation/whatever else. Everything comes with expectations... or else just sleep forever. No expectations there...

hey i agree with everything u say man!!

i don't bother telling ppl that i'm not selfish, cuz i am and i make sure all my friends know it too

if i were to say it in a pessimistic way, i would say "there's only one person u can truely trust/depend on in this world, and that person is yourself".

but i prefer saying "treate others as how u would want them to treate u" cuz it's okay to be selfish as long as u let other ppl gain some from u too in exchange

She never approves of anyone, which is pretty stupid. She definitely fits into the selfish gene. She should read this post!

I don’t know what happened in your past for you to have a negative view of life, but for what it’s worth, I’m sorry that someone hurt you and changed your once pure perception of the world. I strongly believe altruism exists. Unfortunately, many selfish, immoral and deceitful people also live in this world, but so does the complete opposite.

My definition of altruism is the practice of placing others before oneself. With your first example of the father risking his life to save his son, he is practicing altruism. Think about it… if your son is in the middle of the road, and a car is racing down the road @ 40 mph, do you think you’ll have time to reason out why you should save your son? A person might have one second at most to react. Plus, if the dad is not practicing altruism, why would he risk his own life? He can have more kids and live. Plus with gene therapy, he can chose the sex of his baby. Therefore, he has nothing to gain but to save his own child because of love. A parent has unconditional love for their child or should have this type of love.

Your third paragraph is true. People who always help others will not move far financially in this world. But, money is not everything. Unfortunately, some are ruled by money, prestige, and material belongings and will do what’s necessary to gain their desires. Even backstabbing their friend. But, after all is done and they are left with superficial friends, I bet they feel empty and lonely inside. Maybe Bill Gates is donating due to guilt. You never know. My question to everyone is, how important is it to hurt others for your own gain? How much lies, betrayal, and deceit can one live with?

Regarding your second paragraph, many people are selfish, but not all. And, I don’t think it’s fair to correlate trees with people. Yes, in biology life the strongest survive, but they also do not have souls. We feel pain, sorrow, love, happiness…That’s what makes us different. I know it’s sad nice people finish last. It’s true. But, you know what? If you are the nice person, you should stay strong and set an example for others. I always say overcome evil with good. Just because you were backstabbed doesn’t mean you should change your attitude about people in general. Don’t let your past poison your future. I know it’s hard, but try having an optimistic attitude. Unfair things happen to everyone. But don’t walk around w/ a chip on your shoulder. Try turning it around. Shake off your self-pity and be hopeful and know that something good will come your way. I strongly believe what comes around goes around. And, if you maintain being a good person, sooner or later your match will come and both of you will appreciate each other more because of what you went through in your past life.

We cannot allow painful memories and experiences hinder our future goals and dreams. All of us go through pain and difficulty, but what matters is who we become at the end. Don’t be resentful and quit living depressed and be excited about your future. Be grateful for the small things that are taken for granted everyday. Having a roof over our head, being healthy, having friends and family. The only way to stay sane is to choose your attitude and to say no, I will not let my past affect my future. Don’t hang on to your painful memories because it’ll weigh you down and become a negative cycle. Many people do not move forward in life because they don’t know how to even if they do meet the right person.
And, once you meet the right person, how will you ever know since your mind is trapped in despair. Don’t be too busy nursing your wounds and move forward. You cannot take advantage of your present opportunities unless you are willing to let go of your past.

Is your dream greater then the painful memories of the past? Are you focusing on the negative? Let go of what didn’t work out and forgive the people who hurt you. I know you might have 1000 good reasons to stay pessimistic, but you have to move on. Don’t look at life looking in the rear view mirror. Look ahead of what’s to come and don’t let your past weigh you down.

Love,
Someone who cares unselfishly

(This response was originally written ~6/10)